3.30.2009

i don't have to do anything.

I would post a video that my friend took on my cell phone of me 'snowboarding' (in quotes because I just learned how on Saturday after two failed attempts from years ago), but I'm the asshole who lost the Bluetooth chip for my phone... so everything is basically stuck on there and I can't get it off. Typical. But anyway, that's how I spent my weekend. I didn't even have any epic bails or anything, which probably means I'm getting slightly better at sports. Frightening.

Anyway... the Monday Hate-on.

1) Okay, this isn't something I 'hate' per se, just something I'm worried about. You know (well, for those of you who live in the Cowtown) those bunnies (or maybe they're jackrabbits? Hares?) that are all over the place that are brown in summer and turn white in winter (the ones I'm always saying 'OMG, WHITE BUNNIES!!!' about)?

Well, we've had a really long and snowy winter, but now it is technically spring.
The bunnies turn white in winter so they won't be easily caught by predators since they are camouflaged by the snow... but I noticed today that they are already starting to turn brown due to it no longer actually being winter... but there is still so much snow on the ground. Does this mean they're going to get eaten by stuff??? Ugh, I hope not.

2) I hate insurance companies. All of them. And I probably don't care much for people who sell insurance either!

3) My working hours are 8 to 4. Everyday. No, I will not adjust them just because I am doing work for some scientist or other who flat-out refuses to come into work before 10:30. Fuck that- I'm by no means a morning person, but I force myself to be at my job at an ungodly hour just because who the hell wants to still be at work at 6? Maybe someday these people might want to try working on MY schedule.


That's it, that's all. And here is your cool link of the day:



This picture was made using the contents of an old cassette tape.
Click here to see more.

3.25.2009

parking lesson... with diagrams!

If you already now how to properly park a car in a parking lot stall, then just ignore this altogether. Or maybe don't... it's sort of worth it for the crappy Microsoft Paint diagrams. I suck at drawing with a mouse.









Click on the pics if you can't read the text... I am also apparently bad at judging what text size is legible to most people.

3.23.2009

the monday hate-on.

Welcome to the first installment of 'The Monday Hate-on', a list of random complaints, dished out in my typically acerbic manner. Feel free to post angry comments... I'll feel just as free to delete them if I don't like them :)



1) Don't you hate it when you go to Starbucks (or any similarly-styled coffee house), tell your order to the barista/cashier person, then they go and repeat to you what is essentially your order... but substituting all your words with snobby, coffee-house lingo? It's like, fuck you, I don't care for all your dumb, made-up words for things as simple as 'water', 'foam', or 'large'. If I mean I want a 'large' sized beverage, that's EXACTLY what I mean. Now make my drink, and it had better not be lukewarm, or you are so not getting a tip.

2) Why is most peoples' first course of action to phone me in a panic when they can't figure something out? This is especially a piss-off when I agree to drop whatever it is I am doing to help them... only to arrive on the scene to find that, in the mean time, they have found a solution to their problem, and no longer require my help. So... JUST WHY IN THE HELL COULDN'T YOU HAVE PHONED ME RIGHT AFTER YOU FIGURED IT OUT? I think people just like wasting my time.

3) If you're not sure how to pronounce something, for God's sakes, don't say it out loud. No, really, trust me on this one. It will save you a world of embarrassment and ridicule. Like those idiot girls at 7-11 on Saturday... I think they meant TAQUITOS... but they kept saying TOSQUITOS. What the fuck? Where are you getting that from? They're so lucky I didn't pick a fight over it.

TAQUITO


4) I'm starting to get increasingly angry about people not having drivers' licenses when they are older than 21. I am especially annoyed by it when these people start complaining that it takes them 'forever' to get around on the bus. I mean, seriously. Seriously? It's not hard to drive a car. REALLY not hard. It's also not that hard to get a license to drive one... most of us passed the test in 1-2 tries.
Don't complain about the slowness of public transportation if you can't even be bothered to learn how to drive. The rest of us consider you a special kind of stupid.


5) Stop asking me if this is my natural hair color. It's not. In fact, it's a custom color created for me by my hairstylist (it's called 'Veronica Lodge'... that's right, it has a name). Just so you know, I think that people who actually believe that jet or blue black hair exists in nature are complete morons. Just so you know.

6) If you're someone who likes to shake hands with people, can you at least wash your hands? I can't stand poor hygiene in general... but the worst is people who don't consider hand washing all that important. Also, I guess I have enough trust issues that I have trouble believing that MOST people wash their hands often enough at all. Don't feel insulted if I won't shake your hand... I just don't want to catch 'hand herpes' or whatever kind of sickness that you might be choosing to share with me.

xo

3.22.2009

sweet.

Now here's a book that's right up my alley:

Make the Bible Work for You

Can't wait to get to the part where it justifies me doing asshole things to my shitty neighbors. I wonder if that includes digging a moat around their house and filling it with alligators.

3.18.2009

if i had a $100. oh wait... i do.

V. Cool article from March 7th found on the Opinion page of nytimes.com

For Sale: The $100 House

3.14.2009

oh rad.

My friend posted this on Twitter today, and I figured I'd stick it on here too... it's really too insane to not post:

YouTube... Mixed!

No, really, click. This is something way cooler than you'll ever be able to do.

3.12.2009

coral reef.

Found on Boing Boing:


Amadee Coral Reef New Caledonia in New Caledonia

don't lie, you can't read.

Things that people think are gross that are actually good:

1) Kimchi

2) Sashimi

3) Hot dogs (yeah, yeah, they're made of the 'leftovers'... but who cares?)

4) Dried, seasoned seaweed

5) Quail eggs

6) Escargot

7) Pork rinds

8) Corned beef in a can (no, really, fry it up with some potatoes)

9) Pickled eggs


Things that people think are good that are actually gross:

1) Vegan cupcakes (sorry, but my sources- and experiences- tell me that it's eggs and butter that make these babies taste good)

2) Sweet and sour pork (again, something made of 'leftovers'... but to me, 'rubbery' and 'gristly' are two textures that I just can't stomach)

3) Half-cooked bacon (bacon is supposed to be crispy, not wiggly. Ewwwww... 'wiggly'...)

4) Um... I think that's it. Whatever else I was going to put on this list is probably stuff that people think is gross... and actually is gross.

3.10.2009

make it stop.

Or not. I can't decide if these people have entirely too much time on their hands... or they're really kinda rad (albeit, sort of scary).



waste & tragedy.

I was sort of impressed at first watching this video... and then I was concerned, and then I was just downright upset at the blatant lack of concern for the environment displayed... and then I got over it and went back to being impressed. Who NEEDS a garburator anyway???

3.09.2009

goats!

I saw a picture of these little goat guys in National Geographic, climbing trees in Morocco. It looks like a joke, but read about them here:

Goats in Trees?

And now watch a video of them:


um... yuck?



I hope this is real... or maybe not really. It's pretty disgusting.
The grossest thing I've ever eaten is a peanut butter and eggplant sandwich. Yep... just as sick as it sounds.

3.08.2009

life on mars?



I think now everybody knows that I want one of these. A friend of mine up actually does own one... but sadly won't let me have it. I did offer him money for it, but he refused. I don't blame him; these turntables are a really great addition to a living space (if you're into the whole vintage thing, or just have really strange taste in decor... I'm the latter). Anyway, the model is the Circadome and it was manufactured in the 70s by Electrohome (Canadian company). You will be my best friend if you successfully track one down for me (bonus points if you purchase it... don't worry, I will pay you back!).

xoVoltage